I just got back from a Taylor Swift concert at the Staples Center. I didn’t actually plan on going but decided to support a friend who’s friends turned out to be flakier than me. Here are a few tips you should know if you’re going to a Taylor Swift show

Take care of your body

Get off work early. The earlier you get there, the more time you have to comfortably enjoy a meal. Grab a $5 foot long sandwich from Subway and load it with veggies. You’ll be standing on your feet for 3+ hours so eating right before the show will ensure you have the energy just in case you get too comfortable and decide to rest during one of her outfit changes. Buy a Frappuccino. You’ve probably lost sleep the night before wondering what tracks she’ll play and in what order. Also stretch. You wouldn’t want to hurt your neck while tracking Taylor Swift as she’s floating around on a 3’x3′ platform for her closing song.

Understand the audience

Remember age is just a number. The tween with braces who’s accompanied with her parents, the 3 bros that are wearing matching shirts with custom messages declaring their love for Taylor Swift, the recent MBA graduate who decided that separate seats from her friends wasn’t a deal breaker: they’re all like you. You all understand the emotions of longing and heartache.

Do mark your skin or clothing with “13”. Every TRUE Taylor Swift fan will have this emblem stamped on their body somewhere. If you don’t have one, you’re obviously seeing her for the first time and not going to be singing along to songs that weren’t aired on the radio.

Don’t forget that declaring your love for Taylor Swift is most effective when done in high volume (quantity and decibel). The chances of her hearing your distinct message from hundreds of feet away are certainly much more slim if you’re doing it alone. Go with a group who understands this or join another group.

Covers

Study the lyrics to songs she’ll cover: Gwen Stefani – Sweet Escape, Justin Bieber – Baby, The Beach Boys – God Only Knows. When she does these songs, you want to look like a cultured fan who knows her range. Singing along to covers will definitely give you the necessary credibility to talk to  fellow fans at the show. When Justin Bieber shows up on stage, don’t be offended. You can’t like one and hate the other. Trust me, Bieber fans definitely hope Taylor Swift makes a cameo at the next show they go to.

Understand the career path of a pop artist

Haters  always go “Dude. I hate that she’s so popular now. These $30 Ticketmaster fees suck!”. Taylor Swift blew up, deal with it. Do you honestly think that her talents should be limited to a small corner in a coffee shop? Of course not! Her lyrics can only be realized through the magic of theatrics, giant high definition monitors, pyrotechnics, dancers, and moving platforms.

Charge your phone/camera battery

This one is a no-brainer. You’re not a true fan unless you post status updates/tweet about what songs Taylor Swift is singing so all your closet fan friends can feel like they’re there with you. Network coverage will be sparse, so be sure to post carefully and not waste everyone’s time with messages like “Taylor Swift looks soooo good in purple and a ponytail”. When that exclusive live cover happens, you’ll have two options: call your good friend who will appreciate hearing it over a cell phone the most or be the quickest to alert all your social network friends. No one wants to be the last to break news like “Dude, she just mixed in a little Mraz into one of her songs”.

Prepare a defense

You will undoubtedly shock some friends. When they ask you how much you paid and why you went to a Taylor Swift concert if it wasn’t a date, just respond: “Whatever. I wanted to diversify my musical taste. Plus, she’s really great live! I listened to the album and she’s DEFINITELY better live. Oh… She also plays guitar AND piano. That means she’s a true musician” Remind them you were the first in your group to listen to dub-step, loved the Black Eyed Peas when they were just 3 dudes, and were listening to Arcade Fire before they garnered critical acclaim and awards.